Who Knew
by djlee6
Summary: sirius's pov. flashbacksto maurders era. sirius's thoughts as he dies. no spoilers song fic


Okay, so I decided to write another songfic.

It's SiriusxJames.

Enjoy!

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I guess I depending too much on the words 'always' and 'forever'. I'm not sure why. Maybe it was because you were the only one I could always count on. The one person who was like a shadow; always with me.

Maybe that was too much to hope for.

_You took my hand, you showed me how_

_You promised me you'd be around_

My first friend...

I can't even say for sure how we met. Did we meet? Or did we somehow always know eachother through some twist of fate.

Was there a voice whispering to us "you'll see them someday"?

_I took your words and I believed in everything you said to me_

_Uh huh_

_That's right_

No...it was school...

Who would have thought school would bring the beginning of something wonderful?

I don't think I ever laughed like that at home! I had so much fun...

And it wasn't as though it had to be something exciting all the time. I could talk to you and be cheered up from anything...

You've always had that power over me...

_If someone three years from now you'd be long gone_

_I'd stand up and punch them out 'cause they're all wrong_

I never figured I would be the type of person everyone thought was 'cool'. It was a new thing...

And yeah, it was weird and uncomfortable at first. But you were with me...so it was okay...

_Remember when we were such fools? _

_And so convinced and just too cool?_

I hate the idea of you not being here with me anymore.

I thought being friends forever meant always sticking by them?

Or are you here in spirit?

...No, you'd be with your son then, huh?

I think I'm jelous of him, James...

_I wish I could touch you agian_

_I wish I could still call you friend_

_I'd give anything_

Not that I could tell him that! I don't think he'd wonder why on that, but he might get a little worried if he knew I woke up in the middle of the night screaming your name, begging you to please come back or at least take me with you.

To please let me hold you and know you're here...

_When someone said count your blessings now for they're long gone_

_I guess I just didn't know how_

_I was all wrong_

_But they knew better cause you said forever and ever_

_Who knew? _

I am grateful I have Remus...but he's not the same as you. He doesn't have the same fire you have...

Had...

Remus is a wonderful comfort. But when he hugs me to keep the tears from my eyes the only thing I can think of is how he doesn't smell like you.

Harry doesn't even smell like you.

_I'll keep you locked in my head until we meet again_

_(Until we...until we meet again) _

_And I won't forget you my friend_

_What happened? _

The only thing I can hold onto is your laugh...your smile...

They're the only things keeping me from losing my mind completely.

_If someone said three years from now you'd be long gone_

_I'd stand up and punch them out cause they're all wrong. _

I hope I can see you...

I'm dying right now, James. Did you know that?

But I've been dying the whole time...slowly...

So I can see you now right?

My first friend...my first love...

_And that last kiss I'll cherish until we meet again_

_And time makes it harder_

_I wish I could remember_

I can hear Harry screaming...and I wonder if he'll think of me like I've thought of you...

I'm almost there, James...

_But I keep your memory _

_You visit me in my sleep. _

_My darling, who knew? _

_(My darling...my darling, who knew? My darling...I miss you...My darling, who knew?) _

I know I'm dead...

Do you know how?

I can see you as you were when we were kids...

You're in the old Hogwarts uniform, playing with the fluttering snitch in your hand. Letting it go, catching it...

And you see me and smile brightly.

"Come on, Prongs!"

_Who knew..._

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What do you guys think?

R&R!!!


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